Karina Dyer

Meet Karina, wife to Paul, a mother of two gorgeous boys, Ned 4, and Hugo 2, a Personal Stylist and the owner and founder of Personalised Style.  Karina became a Stylist to help people, especially women, feel great about themselves, and to build their confidence through what they wear.  She created Personalised Style and an online styling method, so that all women can be styled by a Personal Stylist, regardless of their location and budget. She strongly believes that every one deserves to feel and look their best every single day!

Kaz0017bw-1 confidence

What does confidence mean to you?

Confidence for me, is being completely comfortable within yourself, believing in who you are, and knowing that you can achieve anything that you put your mind to.

Where did you learn how to be confident, or how are you learning now?

When I was younger, confidence was not something that came naturally to me at all. I witnessed so many people who were not confident, and found themselves in situations that they did not want to be in.They didn’t reach their goals because their lack of confidence was holding them back, or they simply weren’t happy because they weren’t being their true selves.  That was also me, but I decided that I didn’t want that anymore. I really did fake it till i made it! I put myself head first into situations that were completely out of my comfort zone, and wow, it worked!

Each time I did something that I wouldn’t have normally done, I became more and more confident in myself and my abilities. I started believing that it’s ok to be me, it doesn’t matter what other people might say, or how they would look at me. I felt great in my skin, I knew I was the best that I could be. And I was doing everything I could to make others feel good and give them inspiration that they too!

This is where my love for clothes and styling came in. I had always loved shopping, but what I loved more than that, was purchasing particular clothing that was just me. It didn’t matter if it was something that others wouldn’t wear, what mattered was it made me feel great in myself. It gave me an instant boost of confidence, so I could do what I wanted to! I needed to take this further so I could show and help others feel like this, so I decided to take my passion and make it my career.

I became a Personal Stylist through the Australian Style Institute. They taught me so much more than how to wear certain clothing, colours, trends and the art of illusion dressing. They gave me the tools I needed to be able to help my clients achieve what they wanted. For almost every client, it is to help give them more confidence. This may be in their career, and they going for a promotion but didn’t feel confident enough to get it. Or as a public speaker who needed to be able to hold people’s attention. Or a mum who hasn’t had the time to spend on her self and she wants to get back to feeling and looking great.

It didn’t matter what their situation was, we were able to discover exactly what they needed, so they were able to look at themselves and say “Yes I love it”! Next time you go shopping, choose something that you wouldn’t normally go for. Because a lot of the time they are the perfect piece for you!

What do you think makes it difficult for women to love themselves and own who they are?

I strongly believe that comparing yourself to anyone else makes it so hard for us to be our true selves. Comparing yourself is one of the worst things you can do that hurts our self esteem, our confidence and how we live our life. There is no one like you out there, so there is no point comparing, all it does is makes you feel insecure about yourself or your situation.

What challenges do you face that dampens your confident levels?

For me, there are challenges all of the time that could dampen my confidence levels. Don’t get me wrong, I am not confident all of the time. But when I do feel like my confidence has been dampened, I know what I have to do to get it back.  And we can get it back just as quickly as it can get taken from us!

I need to be confident, I know I work better, I am a better mum, a better wife, a better friend, and I am certainly a better Stylist and can help my clients when I am confident! So for me, it is not a choice, it’s a must!

I am always out of my comfort zone, and I have learnt to love the feeling of being there! It doesn’t matter if I am working from home, on a shopping session, or public speaking. I will put on my heels, wear my certain outfits that make me feel empowered and pop on that gorgeous lippy, and I will tackle what is ahead of me.  As I always tell my clients, “clothes are not ‘just’ clothes!

Who is the most confident person in your life and what qualities do they have?

I can’t pick just one person because there are just so many people in my life who have confidence in their own way. I draw inspiration from so many, through business, personal life and motherhood. Most of all what I love about these people is they are completely happy within themselves. They know they can achieve what they set out to do and they are creating a life that they honestly love. It is a great thing to see, and be a part of.

When do you feel your most confident, powerful, or beautiful?

For me, feeling confident, powerful and beautiful really comes down to how I present myself. I have a few certain outfits that when I wear, nothing is going to stop me!  It may sound strange to some, but for myself, and now for my clients, we have outfits that can really change the way we think. They change the way people think of us, how we can handle ourselves and the situation we are in. I also feel most beautiful when my 4 year old son says, “oh mum, you look so pretty”. Which is usually when I have just gotten out of bed, or when he wants chocolate! But that’s ok, I’ll take it.

Do you have any quick confidence tips when you want to boost your self-esteem?

Dress up! Put on your confidence outfit (including some lippy) hold your head high, shoulders back and look at yourself in the mirror, straight into your eyes, and say “I’ve got this” then go!

Remind yourself that there is no one like you out there, you can handle it, and don’t worry about what others think! I tell myself all of the time, and usually more when I am about to do something that I have never done, that I can do this. Don’t listen to any negative thoughts in your head, it isn’t helpful, and nothing good will come from it!

self care checklist

Is there anything else you would like to share or advice for other women who may be struggling with their own confidence and self-worth?

One of the tips that has helped myself and so many other women, is walk into your wardrobe and get rid of anything that doesn’t make you feel good! It is a complete waste of space. No one really needs to keep those jeans that “one day” we will get back into. If you cant bring yourself to throw these pieces out, put it in a storage bag and get it out of your sight. It is emotional baggage that you don’t need to be reminded of every single day.

Sit down and think about things that you are good at, what you like about yourself, what you are grateful for and write them down. When someone says something nice, it can be anything, write it down and keep it somewhere. That way, you can remember the feeling you had when it happened. Accepting a compliment doesn’t come easy for a lot of us, it takes practice. A lot of the time we don’t even realise how nice the comment was because we are so quick to reply with “oh really?” when all we need to say is “thank you” we need to acknowledge and accept the compliments, not reject them.

Treat yourself like you would treat your best friend, only say nice things to yourself, give yourself a break because we can be our own worst enemy. Be kind, be patient and be understanding of yourself!

Be yourself and own it, because there is no one like you, and that is a powerful and beautiful thing!

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Thank you karina!

 

 

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Comments

    1. Jess

      Yes, I think Karina really understands. It really can’t hurt to just try different techniques and see what works.

  1. I was feeling really flat and gross yesterday and then I changed my outift and amazingly, felt better! It really can make a difference.

  2. What a great post. I’ve fallen into bad habits since we moved. I’ve also put on weight with the new meds. It means my wardrobe choices are limited and making me not want to leave the house. I don’t really want to spend any money on new clothing when I’m told once we sort the meds my weight should sort itself but I think having a wardrobe that works for me and not against me might actually help how I’m feeling right now.

    1. Jess

      Definitely agree. I think working on what will make you feel better now rather than later will be great for the self esteem.

  3. I love these tips. I really need to clean out my wardrobe and get rid of anything that doesn’t make me feel happy and confident. Thanks for sharing and linking up to the ultimate rabbit hole! Xx

    1. Jess

      I need to do this as well, so many clothes are in my closet for a ‘some day’ event..crazy!

  4. Oh, thanks for sharing! I’m usually confident when it comes to doing certain things – work, for example…. but struggle if it’s something new. As for the physical me… not at all!

  5. Good timing! I’ve been losing weight gradually over the past 2 years but couldnt quite grasp that it was happening…after all I’d spent about 30 years being more than overweight. I call it the ‘anxiety/IBS’ way to lose weight… my doctor says I am OK so it’s something that I need to accept. What I found harder to accept was that I needed new clothes. yes, I did and it was my swimmers almost falling off me in the surf that convinced me (not pretty) so out have gone the very fat clothes and to replace them the at high end of normal size shop clothes and I feel better. In fact much better and confidence in myself is helping the anxiety to subside. Denyse

    1. Jess

      Good on you for celebrating yourself with clothes that make you feel good!

  6. I really love Karina’s advice of having a confidence outfit to wear when confidence is low. This is something I’ve been struggling with working from home – there is no need for fancy clothes or makeup so i have felt my confidence slide a little as a result. But it really shouldn’t matter – as long as I feel good it doesn’t matter if no-one else but my pugs gets to see my style!

    1. Jess

      I am the same when I work from home Kirsty, I usually just wear sweats, but then feel a bit crappy about myself. Putting a little effort in can boost that confidence quickly!

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