Confident Women: Caroline Alana
Mum to playful little Alfie, Caroline owns Avidiva, a natural baby boutique. Avidiva is full of gorgeous ecofriendly items, to really give babies the most natural start we can. Being mum to a premmie baby has been a challenge so far, but Caroline’s keen to share her experiences… With a BSc in Psychology, Caroline spends her days researching, sourcing and testing out products to choose only the finest to be featured in Avidiva (as well as dealing with toddler tantrums!) ☺ Welcome Caroline!
What does confidence mean to you?
I think confidence just means being able to be yourself, and being proud of that. It’s not all about showing off or being the loudest, but just being content with what you are, what you believe in and how you want to enjoy life. There’s no better feeling than being ready, certain and ambitious, but it’s definitely a deeper state than just a smile and a spring in your step.
Where did you learn how to be confident, or how are you learning now?
I am most definitely a work in progress! It’s hard to accept who you are and be happy with that. It’s always easier to beat yourself up, put yourself down, and be a worrier. I am slowly learning though, and I honestly think that being a mum helps. It helps puts life in perspective, it’s not such a worry what size clothes your wearing or how many chocolate bats you’ve eaten that day. It’s more about learning to love yourself, your decisions and to own them! It’s dealing with the self doubt that is the hardest part. Needing to honour your own decisions, stand by them and be proud of them. Once you can do that, you’ve nailed it! I think this is what makes for a truly content life.
What do you think makes it difficult for women to love themselves and own who they are?
There are so many ideals that are put before us, for both men and women, but we can’t possibly be them all! The challenge we face as women is that we are so passionate and ambitious that we often aspire to be these people, or we want an element of it all. We just can’t be ten different people at once. Perfect housewife, fitness fanatic, devoted mother, caring friend, party animal, avid vegan etc. We see the benefits in all of these and need to find a balance as to how these our reflected in our own personality, and how this makes us the individual we are.
What challenges do you face that dampens your confident levels?
As a wife, mum, business owner, and part time employee, my days are full of challenges! Being pulled in many directions and having to make compromises or sacrifices makes me question my confidence, and my knowledge of who I am.
A simple set back such as not being able to get my son to nap really sets the anxiety levels soaring. I want a logical reason, an explanation, and a solution (and as we know, this really isn’t compatible with babies!). I make daily decisions about my business. In a way this is empowering, and fun, often exciting. But sometimes nerve wracking and worrying. It can be easier to not make these decisions at all rather than risk the possibility of rejection or failure.
It’s a complex thing. A single comment from a colleague, a snooty email, lack of sales at a market, or a pair of pants that don’t fit. They can all equally affect my confidence levels in one single, brief moment!
Who is the most confident person in your life and what qualities do they have?
There are a few people who I admire as being confident. I won’t name names but a similar trait seems to be their passion. It’s this quality that identifies them and sees them through in every decision they make. For example, my selfless, aid working friend who always looks so gorgeous and put together. She’s a fashion lover, blogs about style, enjoys travelling, culture and has far too many kind bones in her body! Her fundraising, volunteer work, local events, they all just build upon her personality and reassure her that she is exactly where she is meant to be and doing what she shines at most.
A colleague who’s a fitness fanatic, super competitive and highly motivated triathlete. She puts her heart and soul into everything. Up at the crack of dawn to train, prioritising her fitness while her little ones sleep, she knows exactly what she wants and make damn sure she gets it (the issue is when things don’t quite go to plan!) This comes across in her work and family life too, determination and want to succeed. It’s an attractive quality to have ☺
When do you feel your most confident, powerful, or beautiful?
Oooh this is a tricky one! Lately life has just been such a hectic whirlwind that there’s not too much beauty or power, more just survival instinct! But yes, I am definitely at the top of my game after a morning run, a good breakfast and a cappuccino. With the sun shining, endorphins and caffeine pumping, and the whole day ahead as a blank canvas to create, inspire and achieve. Even simple things such as writing to do lists can make me feel more powerful and in control. It’s just the act of owning the moment, and doing what you need to do in it. Thanks for this question, you’ve reminded me I do need to get my trainers on much more regularly ☺
Do you have any quick confidence tips when you want to boost your self-esteem?
On the days when you feel like donning a hoody and leggings, and curling up on the sofa, put on a nice outfit, maybe a bit of make up too. As much as it shouldn’t matter, it really does make a difference! Even just having an energy boost with a sing in the shower, fresh clean hair and some good smelling soap suds can really perk up your mood.
Is there anything else you would like to share or advice for other women who may be struggling with their own confidence and self-worth?
It’s not easy! I think it’s all about being able to be happy with the decisions you make, regardless of what they are. If you can happily live life with no regrets, then you must be doing something right!
‘Sprinkle kindness around like confetti’
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